The Dos and Don’ts of Meeting Your Bulgarian Girlfriend’s Parents

Meeting your Bulgarian girlfriend’s parents for the first time is a big deal — often bigger than in many Western countries. In Bulgaria, parents (especially mothers and grandmothers) still have a strong say in their daughter’s choice of partner. A successful first meeting can fast-track family approval and make your relationship official in their eyes; a bad one can create obstacles that last for years.

Here is the ultimate practical guide of dos and don’ts, based on real experiences of foreigners who have survived (and thrived) in this rite of passage.

The Dos – What Will Win Their Hearts

1. Bring thoughtful gifts
   • Flowers for the mother (odd number of stems, never even — even numbers are for funerals). Roses or seasonal flowers are safe.
   • A good bottle of alcohol for the father (whiskey, mastika, or quality rakia if you know the brand he likes).
   • Chocolates or traditional sweets (lokum, halva) for the household.
   • If there’s a grandmother, something small and sentimental (a scarf, perfume, or sweets she likes).
2. Dress respectfully but not overdressed Clean, ironed shirt, good jeans or chinos, proper shoes. No shorts, flip-flops, or flashy logos. In winter, take off your shoes at the door without being asked.
3. Greet properly
   • Shake the father’s hand firmly while looking him in the eye.
   • Kiss the mother’s hand (yes, really — the old-school hand kiss still melts Bulgarian mothers).
   • Use “Zdraveite” (formal hello) at first. Switch to the informal “Zdravei” only if they insist.
4. Address them correctly Call them “gospodzho [First Name]” and “gospodine [First Name]” or simply “mamo” and “tate” if your girlfriend gives the green light. Never use just the first name without title at the beginning.
5. Eat everything (and ask for seconds) Refusing food is the fastest way to offend. Eat heartily, praise every dish with “Mnogo vkusno!” or “Chudno!” Accept second and third helpings — it shows respect. If you’re full, leave a symbolic bite on the plate.
6. Compliment the home and the cooking Say something like “Kakva krasiva kashta!” (What a beautiful house!) or “Taya banitsa e nai-vkusnata, koyato sam yadal!” (This is the best banitsa I’ve ever eaten!).
7. Show interest in Bulgaria Ask the father about his favorite football team (Levski or CSKA?), mention a Bulgarian historical figure you admire, or talk about a place you’ve visited. Even basic effort impresses.
8. Offer to help Clear the table, wash dishes, or help carry things. Bulgarian men are expected to be useful — doing this scores massive points.
9. Learn a few key phrases in Bulgarian Even if your pronunciation is terrible:
   • “Priyatno mi e da se zapoznaem” (Pleased to meet you)
   • “Blagodarya za prekrasnata vecherya” (Thank you for the wonderful dinner)
   • “Nazdrave!” with proper eye contact when toasting
10. Be patient with the interrogation Expect direct questions: “What do you do?”, “How much do you earn?”, “When will you marry?”, “How many children do you want?”. Answer honestly and confidently — they respect straightforwardness.

The Don’ts – Common Mistakes That Can Ruin Everything

1. Don’t arrive empty-handed Showing up with nothing is seen as cheap and disrespectful.
2. Don’t refuse rakia or alcohol If you don’t drink, say you have to drive or take medication — never say “I don’t drink” (it can be interpreted as judging their culture). Accept one symbolic sip if pressed.
3. Don’t criticize Bulgaria or compare negatively to your country Even jokingly saying “In my country we do it better” will not be forgiven.
4. Don’t be late Bulgarians value punctuality for family events. Better to arrive 5–10 minutes early.
5. Don’t overuse your phone Checking messages at the table is extremely rude.
6. Don’t show too much PDA in front of parents A quick kiss on the cheek is fine; making out or holding hands under the table is not.
7. Don’t talk politics unless you know their views Bulgarian families can be deeply divided (pro-EU vs. pro-Russia, etc.). Stay neutral.
8. Don’t leave quickly after eating The visit should last at least 2–3 hours. Rushing out looks like you only came for the free food.
9. Don’t brag or show off money Flashy watches or talking about how much you earn (unless asked directly) comes across as arrogant.
10. Don’t correct your girlfriend in front of her parents Even if she’s wrong about something small, save it for later.

Bonus Tips from Foreigners Who Married Bulgarian Women

• “The hand kiss on my mother-in-law literally made her cry happy tears. Do it.” – Michael (UK)
• “I brought Johnnie Walker Black Label for the father. He still talks about it five years later.” – Alex (USA)
• “When baba asked if I wanted more sarma and I said ‘Blagodarya, nasitena sam’ (I’m full), she looked sad. Next time I just took more.” – Daniel (Germany)
• “I learned to say ‘Nazdrave, da ste zhivi i zdрави!’ (Cheers, may you be alive and healthy!). The father hugged me and said ‘This boy is one of us.’” – James (Australia)

Final Verdict

Meeting Bulgarian parents is less about perfection and more about showing respect, effort, and genuine interest in their daughter and their world. If you follow the dos and avoid the major don’ts, you’ll likely leave with hugs, an invitation for next Sunday lunch, and your girlfriend whispering “Te obichat!” (They love you!).

Remember: In Bulgaria, winning the parents is often 80% of winning the girl for the long term. Good luck — and nazdrave for the big day!